Blessings of a Life Surrendered

Mathew 10:39 tells us that “if you cling to your life, you will lose it; but if you give up your life for me, you find it.”

What does it mean “to cling to your life”?

The dictionary defines “cling” as:

              -to hold fast or adhere to something, as by grasping, sticking, embracing, or entwining

              -to remain close, resist separation

              -to remain emotionally attached; hold on

Can’t you picture this “clinging”? An anxious child wrapped around a mother’s leg, begging her not to leave him on the first day of school. Clinging to the rope for dear life to keep from falling. Wet fabrics or clothing that cling to the body. Clinging together in a storm. Clinging to outdated customs or clinging to the past. There is static cling. A stage 5 clinger. People clinging together in terror or fear. Cling wrap. We cling to hope. Your car clings to the curb on a mountainside drive. People cling to power, and the dying cling to life.

These phrases are great depictions or images of what, we as people, have a tendency to do with our lives. Rather than surrendering our whole lives to our Creator, the One who know us best, and knows what is best FOR us, we try to maintain control. We grip tightly to our plans, our wants, our desires, our safety blankets, our habits, our futures, and our loved ones, never fully submitting to the ultimate authority of Christ.

This has me asking these questions:

-what are we missing out on that God wants so badly for us, but we are too fearful, comfortable, or stubborn to find out?

-what if the blessings on the other side of surrender are so amazing, so mind-blowing, so for our good, so beyond our imagination even despite any difficulty or struggle?

-what if we never fully come to take part in God’s plan for our lives and we fall short of His best for us on this side of eternity even though He gives us chance after chance, invitation after invitation, prompting after prompting?

-Not only would we miss the chance to personally see these plans played out and live in the midst of His blessing, but we could miss the opportunity for our story to bring Him glory and much deserved praise to His great Name.

-Who needs to hear our story and who needs to see our obedience?

-who needs permission to live their life in a counter-cultural way and would receive strength by watching you walk in faith?

I am thankful to be able to say that by the unmerited grace of God, I am learning what it is like to live a life surrendered to the Lordship of Christ. Not only do I know sweet Jesus as Savior, but I seek to live daily submitted to His authority over me and my life. I still have much sanctification to go, but I can see the fruit of obedience playing out before me.

It is no secret to those around us that Mason and I haven’t been living according to culture in many ways for quite some time, but living submitted, asking God that He make perfect His strength in our weaknesses as we oftentimes nervously take a step of faith toward the things that the Lord has instructed us to do.

We certainly haven’t figured it all out and are not perfect at this, but His faithfulness emboldens us to live a life of obedience and watch His plans unfold. At times our faith has been shaky, especially when we cannot clearly see, but God’s Word tells us in 2 Corinthians 5:7 that we are to “walk by faith, not by sight.”

Hebrews 11:1 says that “faith is assurance of things hoped for, and the evidence of things not seen.”

These scriptures have helped us to see Mason victoriously overcome a level of alcohol addiction, start a community-based couples bible study together, make job transitions, begin the process of moving away from the comfort of what we know and begin a new life where God is calling us in this next season, and to continue having our beautiful children (hello six daughters) with the promise of a son in our heart.

God has been faithful each-and-every step of the way, speaking to us, encouraging us with confirmations or signs along the way, and giving us the courage to press on despite often being misunderstood, having friends distance themselves from us, or even at times being called “crazy”.

One scripture the Lord has given us to hold onto is Hebrews 10:23. It is the evidence of why we named our 6th daughter, Hope, and the reason I often wear a necklace with the word “Hope” on it. A declarative of the prophetic promise we had been given- “let us hold tightly without wavering to the hope we affirm, for God can be trusted to keep His promise.”

Well, He most certainly can be trusted. A promise spoken, is a promise kept for the Lord. Joshua 23:14 says “now I am about to go the way of all the earth. You know with all your heart and soul that not one of all the good promises the Lord your God gave you has failed. Every promise has been fulfilled; not one has failed”

After 7 years of waiting, countless documented words from the Lord of hope and perseverance, many times of prayer and signs and visions, innumerable confirmations to continue to believe that what God said would come to pass, we are being given the gift of our baby boy, Our Nate.

To show how amazing the purposeful way in which God works things out in our lives, I will share with you a few of the incredible details. Throughout this entire journey, the Lord has used the number 17 to confirm and communicate with us. It was like a “God wink” to authenticate what we were experiencing. So, appropriately, and without our planning, during the 17th month of Mason’s sobriety, on June 17th, the 17th day of my cycle, our long-awaited son, Nathan David Zabel, was conceived. One cannot perfectly purposefully pinpoint timing or make these things up. There are simply no coincidences with God. Nate will be our 7th child. 7 represents completion, perfection, and the fulfillment of promises and oaths. He will be our 7th child in 12 years. 12 represents authority, appointment, and completeness. His due date is March 8th, 2021.~ 3-8~. Just before learning that we were pregnant, I have documented, that God showed me Isaiah 38:7.~ 3-8-7~. Which says: “And this is the sign from the LORD to prove that He will do as He promised” He whispered to me then in that moment, in my spirit, that “it has begun”, and “Nate is on his way”. In January of 2021 it will be exactly 20 years after Nate Fleming, Mason’s beloved best friend, lost his life in the OSU plane crash. The number 20 represents a complete or perfect waiting period. There are no coincidences with God. Although Mason will not be reunited with Nate Fleming again until heaven, this waiting period is over, and he is being gifted another Nate, our Nate. I will be 37 when the vision my dear friend Stephanie and I both have seen of me holding a baby wrapped in a blue blanket in a hospital bed will come to pass. Mason will be 40, which symbolizes a period of testing, trial, or probation that is coming to a close with the birth of his son. We will be married for 14 years when we meet our little boy, which implies a double measure of spiritual perfection and deliverance. There are no coincidences with God.

Numbers 23:19 says “God is not a man, so he does not lie. He is not a human, so he does not change his mind. Has he ever spoken and failed to act? Has he ever promised and not carried it through?”

Although it may not happen immediately, and your faith may falter, He always keeps His promises to us even if it is some time ahead in the future. We always believed we would meet our Nate someday, but sometimes found it difficult to see how it would all play out, and frankly never could have imagined that this is how it would it would look. I am finding that to be pretty typical of how God works.

“This vision is for a future time. It describes the end, and it will be fulfilled. If it seems slow in coming, wait patiently, for it will surely take place. It will not be delayed.” Habakkuk 2:3

I honestly am having trouble wrapping my mind around living in the midst of a promise fulfilled. I am afraid to fully believe it is happening until I see him with my own eyes, even though we have had two DNA tests and multiple confirmatory ultrasounds. I have to wonder if that is why Sarah laughed when Isaac was born? Was she so overwhelmed that her long wait was over and her miracle had finally arrived that she was moved to laughter?

This seven-year journey has taught us a lot. We have learned that God is very personal and very specific and very detailed. We have learned that God speaks to His beloved and longs for us to invite Him into our lives in both the big and the small things.

He wants to partner with us to display His splendor and glory through our everyday lives.

We have learned like Abraham and Sarah, Noah, King David, Hannah, Joseph, and many others in the Bible that there is often a waiting period between when God speaks a promise to when it comes to fruition. What may be perceived as a delay is certainly not a denial.

Ultimately, we have learned that the “promise” is not the end goal. Knowing Jesus in an intimate way is, and He has used this experience to draw us closer to Himself. He is the prize.

With the realization of this blessing coming to pass, the fact that we serve an Ephesians 3:20 God has come into full focus. “Now all glory to God, who is able, through His mighty power at work within us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think.” When we looked forward at our life on our wedding day, seven children being a part of our story is certainly not what we imagined!

 Our Nate is an added blessing to our life, but not the culmination or completion of our blessings.

The Lord has blessed us with six amazing daughters that we love, adore, and cherish. We are so thankful that God has allowed us to know each one of them and didn’t stop short of any one of them to give us Nate. We wouldn’t have the honor of knowing vivacious Maggie, precious Georgia, or happy Hope, had Nate come any moment sooner. Each and every one of our 6 daughters is a vital component of our family. Nate is coming at just the perfect time and in the most perfect way, because that is just what the Lord does…..He is never late, rarely early, but always right on time.

I can’t wait to shout from the rooftops of the Lord’s faithfulness, and I hope to bring honor and glory to the sovereign Lord Almighty through this story.

I don’t know what God has planned for this little boy, but I know his life will be full of purpose and he will live every day knowing that he is just what his name  means a “Beloved Gift from God”.

As you can imagine, we are beyond excited to get to know the miracle that is, Our Nate.